You don't have to struggle alone

You do have to struggle, but you don't have to do it alone

This week has been really hard… but I think I’m starting to turn the corner.

Therapy has brought up my most painful memories — things I’ve been purposely hiding from because I don’t think I can ever work them out.

And it’s created a real emotional roller coaster for me. I spent an afternoon last week, talking on the phone with a crisis counselor from the VA. Just to talk; I’m not in any danger. I just… really hurt inside, and I needed some extra support.

(And I’m glad I was stable enough to recognize that! A lot of veterans, in particular, think we have to always “go it alone.”)

I might share some of the details of what I’m struggling with in a future newsletter, but for once, I’m not ready to just dive right into it all.

And I think that’s okay, though.

No… I think that’s more than okay — I think it’s healthy, and responsible, to recognize when I’m not ready to divulge my most intimate thoughts, fears, and doubts.

As much as I want to put everything out there for the whole world to see… I’m learning that sometimes it’s wise to wait… and sometimes, with really, really hard things… maybe I don’t need to tell everyone every little detail.

But I always need to be able to tell somebody, even if it’s a VA crisis counselor who can’t do anything for me but just listen, and tell me it’ll be okay.

I need to know that it’s safe to tell at least one person, everything that I’m going through. (And it doesn’t always have to be the same person, every time… I just need to be able to lean on someone else, when necessary.)

We all need somebody in our life that we can lean on. That we can talk to about anything. That we know won’t judge us, or turn us away, or be too busy, or think that we’re too “extra” to even deal with.

If you have somebody like that in your life right now… you’re so blessed.

I hope you will let that person know, today, how much they mean to you. I don’t think we can ever thank the good people in our lives enough for just being good people, and sharing this thing we call life.

If you don’t have somebody in your life right now… please don’t give up hope!

Please do whatever you have to do to find just one person. It can be a friend, a family member, a stranger on the Internet, a therapist.

(Everybody should have a good therapist - especially if you don’t have anyone else you can talk to. A licensed, trained professional can help you figure out how to become the person that can make a new friend, or find a new confidant. You don’t have to struggle alone.)

And I think that’s where I’m gonna end off this week:

You don’t have to struggle alone.

No matter who you are, no matter where you live, no matter what you’ve done… you’re not in this alone.

If nothing else, I believe in you — and I want to see you happy.

You can be happy, again, you know? And you can get there a heck of a lot faster, if you’ve got friends.

---